Shambhavi's Shells

       After a whole school year of blog posts, new novels, harkness discussions, poetry, and essays, the school year finally came to an end for us seniors. It's only right that my final blog post of high school is dedicated to all the authors, pieces, novels, and people that inspired me throughout this journey in AP Lit.     To start, I would like to mention my favorite author and poet, Cathy Park Hong. Most of my blog posts have already been dedicated to this author, but the impact of her book Minor Feelings, especially The Indebted, and now her multiple pieces of poetry resonated with me as her avid fan. Park Hong's pieces are usually about the Asian American experience, which is something that I hadn't been able to read much of growing up, so now finding an author whose experiences are relatable and understandable makes Park Hong an important author to me.     Now, although I am not a fan of poetry and it was certainly not my favorit...

  The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupery Even though The Little Prince is considered a children's book by many, it has been regarded as a book that teaches a lot about relationships and understanding the world as a whole. Since I'll be going off to college soon, having the little prince as the top of my reading syllabus will make sure that I read this book first before going off to experience a new journey in my life.  Alice's Adventure in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll  To me, this is a little embarrassing but I've actually never seen, heard, or read the entire story of Alice in Wonderland but after some research about the book, I've learned that it's about the struggle of understanding and becoming a part of the "adult world", which seems to fit in well with for someone who will soon have to go through the same struggle.    Little Women by Louisa May Alcott After hearing about this book being adapted into different movies and shows, I've alwa...

           Walking into the classroom 12 AP room, everyone was new to me. I ended up sitting at the same pod as Cecelia and Alex (Sonnet joined us a little later), these were people that I had never spoken to before.       Now, since in AP Lit we had to almost always have pod discussions, the four of us, considering the fact that at least three of us are introverts, had a hard time making conversation at first. Those first few days of awkward silence and stagnant conversation is a memory that will always stay with me because since then, I've learned how to communicate my thoughts and ideas more freely with my pod always supporting me (plus Lily:) ).     Throughout high school, if there is something that I have learned and consistently tried to improve upon, then it has to be taking every opportunity I can get rather than letting some slip past me. I have always been finding myself letting good opportunities get away b...

     Dear Mrs. Hong!      You most likely don't know who I am, but I am a huge fan of your writing!      I am a senior in high school and I've encountered your pieces multiple different times, both as an assignment and through my free time.      The first time I came across your writing was when we were assigned The Indebted from your book Minor Feelings, which has become a huge part of my philosophy as I become more involved in literature and the history of my ancestors.      In AP Literature we were asked to choose a poem as our mentor poem to further develop our writers voice, and the first poem that came to mind was your poem "Zoo", which I was able to connect to as a South Asian in America with immigrant parents. The depth and somewhat obscurity at the beginning of the poem regarding the symbolism of the zoo interested me in finding a new way to deliver my ideas through symbolism.      Th...

     Defining and finding meaning line by line of any written piece has never been my strong suit, but with the poem my group chose for the poetry panel project, I find that it's necessary to understand every line in the poem since each line holds a valuable meaning that develops the underlying message of the poem. We are, I am, you are by cowardice or courage the one who find our way back to this scene carrying a knife, a camera a book of myths in which our names do not appear.      The stanza above is the final stanza in the poem Diving into the Wreck . During my first read of the poem, I found myself confused with what the poem was trying to say, at first glance the poem was really just about the speaker going on a dive to explore a wreck that she witnesses. Now since this is the poem from my group's poetry panel project I won't give out any spoilers, but I do want to mention that I admire how each and every word from Rich's poem carries weight to it....

     Last year in AP Lang we read a part of Cathy Park Hong's book Minor Feelings, specifically, The Indebted, and Hong's writing style and word choice stuck with me as impactful and gave me a new perspective on different ideas.      When thinking of beautiful words and poetry, the first thing that came to my mind was Minor Feelings and The Indebted. Although I haven't read all of Minor Feelings, there were two lines from the book that stuck out to me as beautiful.      “Innocence is both a privilege and a cognitive handicap, a sheltered unknowingness that, once protracted into adulthood, hardens into entitlement.” Hong's choice of words such as "unknowingness" and "hardens" brings a sense of (interestingly enough) innocence turning into the knowledge of self, which is exactly what Hong is trying to convey. Another notable word to point out is Hong referring to innocence as a "cognitive handicap", unlike others who would refer...

       As water shows us our reflections, I'm taking the time (partially since it's the assignment) to look into important water at this point in the school year.      First of all, senior year has honestly been going pretty well for me. Compared to online school sophomore year, I've been able to connect with others a lot more, and I've made so many new friends. Looking back on the first day of school I ended up sitting in a pod with Cecelia and Alex, both of which I had never spoken to before this class, now these two (plus Sonnet who I knew before) have become an important part of AP Lit for me so far.      I find that I always share any and every idea that comes to mind regardless of if the idea makes sense or not with my pod, and they find ways to add on to my analysis. reading and discussing passages as a pod was something I always enjoyed and something I hope to be able to continue doing second semester.    I found t...

In Pachinko and The Importance of Being Earnest, the difference in the marital relationships between eastern and western couples brings significant differences in the fulfillment and happiness of marriage and becoming married. In the first two generations of the novel Pachinko, we witness arranged marriages for both Yangjin and Sunja, two female characters in the novel. Arranged marriage is seen as a more frequent occurrence in eastern countries, so arranged marriage being the deciding factor of Yangjin and Sunja’s relationship and life is not unordinary, especially considering the time period of the first two generations of the novel. Both Yangjin and Sunja were in unstable positions before their marriages were arranged, whether it be financially or socially. Neither woman had the idea of “raising” their social status, rather they wanted to “save their social status. Although “this does not mean that one must be rich to make a marriage work. However, if one has the basic necessities o...

      Throughout the Stranger, we see the different portrayals of women and men in Algier in the 1940's. My pod discussed this often, even before we learned that Mersault was on the spectrum.      The way different male characters treated the women in the novel was both surprising and not surprising at the same time. Already noticing that Mersault seemed detached from the others in his life, the way he treated Marie compared to Celeste or Raymond differed greatly.      Although Mersault seemed distant from most people around him, Mersault's perspective and how he viewed Marie was similar to how someone views an object. "I wanted her so bad" or "I wanted her to stay with me" at first didn't shock me since many of Mersault's sentences (using the ctrl F feature 21times) started with "I want" and directly conveyed his feelings, but Mersault's possessive form of "I want" for Marie was not seen with other characters.      Now pa...

       (This blog post is merely thoughts and opinions)     Humor is something that varies from person to person. My pod happened to be discussing a topic that we found extremely hilarious: bananas.   After Cecelia brought up cucumbers in The Importance of Being Earnest , we started to talk about foods that are seen as phallic, bananas being one of them.      while the phallic nature of bananas was what started this conversation on bananas, we began to talk about bananas and the different ways to peel them. Although this topic isn't as funny as a stand up comedian's act, we found that being able to relate to what's being joked about makes it easier to laugh and find the conversation interesting.        Something as mundane as bananas became a topic that we talked about for a good amount of time and enjoyed talking about. So does humor really vary from person to person or is how we experience humor what make...

      In Toni Morrison’s Recitatif, the story of two young girls in a temporary orphanage and then zooming in on their lives multiple years later, the readers are taken through an experiment where the factor of race has never been clarified.       Throughout the whole short story, Morrison never clarifies the race of the two girls, Roberta and Twyla, instead Morrison leaves it up to the reader to figure it out themselves. This reminded me of those “choose your story” books from when we were younger, where one small decision we took could impact the rest of the story's experience for us. For those who assigned a race to each character from the beginning, the story could have become confusing, or our perspective could have changed throughout the story. For those who didn't assign a race to the characters, we could've used other means to decide the girl's social standings, like their economic situation or relationships(family and friends).   ...

     The inequality faced by women in stories such as Pachinko , Cat in the rain , and Story of an Hour was not only forced upon them, but in a way it was reinforced by the women's misconceptions of their place in society.      As many are aware today, the oppression against women has been something enforced by society, especially men and patriarchal beliefs. What some may not know is that women have also brought the misconception upon themselves. In Pachinko , Sunja was constantly told by the women around her that she needed to devote herself to her husband “otherwise another woman will”. Yangjin, Sunja’s mother, herself was devoted to Sunja’s father, and enforced this thought process on Sunja too. To someone young and innocent, another woman’s words, especially someone the young girl looked up to, would be taken heavily, and possibly influence her mindset and perspective. In Pachinko , Sunja later meets Kyunghee, who has been in a patriarchal relationsh...

      Under a diving board at what seems to be a community center, I bump into a girl who appears to be around 5'10 in height, East Asian, slender, with long black hair, and wearing a school's swim and dive merch. "Oh I'm so sorry, my name is ....." "I'm sorry could you repeat that?"      No response.     The mysterious girl turns around and walks into the locker room where I follow her but cannot seem to find her.     On my way up the stairs to leave the community center I see the girl again, this time at the top of a flight of stairs. I run up the stairs towards her but she walks away and turns a corner and now I've lost her again.     I walk out further to a set of bleachers where again at the top I see the figure of the girl. This time I ask the janitor nearby. "I keep running into this girl but every time I approach her she disappears."     "Look shes up on the bleachers"     As I tu...

       "Stop shaking your leg; you'll shake the luck out" ( Crying in H mart ) these are words I've heard too often.     I grew up in a fairly Indian household where superstitions were a part of my daily life. "Don't cut your nails at night" or "Don't shake your legs" was something that I heard often and even unconsciously follow to this day.      While reading Crying in H mart , the author's mother reminded me of my mom at times, especially with how she brought up superstitions and other reminders to make sure Michelle, the author, presented herself the best she could.      While this quote at first might not be seen as beautiful, the words Michelle's mother uses are not something complex that has multiple meanings and takes hours to understand, rather they are simple words that come from a mother worried for her daughter's luck and future.     When this line first came up, I felt more connected to the book tha...

     With this being the first 12 AP blog, I think introducing myself and talking about the origins of my name would be a better way to start the school year.      So the name Shambhavi (Shum-ba-vee). Having a unique name already distinguishes me from others. My name usually isn't something that people are able to pronounce correctly the first time. Instead, I'll get a few mispronounced versions of my name before the right pronunciation.      As a child, my appreciation for my name was much lower than it is now. I wasn't used to being the only unique name in between other Toms, Sallys, and Jims. In third grade, I chose to go by SGS which is my initials rather than my full name, which I wasn't able to continue for more than a week because of my teacher. Growing up my parents told me how my name was chosen, but the weight and significance of the name took longer for me to understand.      Shambhavi: the name of a...

      As we know of Mr. Faust, who makes a deal with the devil ultimately exchanging his soul for money, fame, and success, it's well known that the deal Faust made was intentional, unlike Dorian Gray.      It is true that Dorian sobs in front of his portrait wishing that he remained young while the portrait aged, but Dorian never sat in a room and made a deal face to face with the devil. Dorian's wish was granted, but he himself was unaware of what the conditions of his wish were, ultimately ruining the very innocence in him that Basil adored.     I've heard from multiple people how they can't stand Dorian Gray, but sometimes we forget that Dorian's character was built off of Lord Henry's ideals. Lord Henry chose to influence Dorian because of Dorian's beauty and innocence. With this, it is safe to say that Dorian's wish to remain young was created by Lord Henry and as Angelina noticed "Lord Henry and Basil are like the devil and angel ...

     In the novel The Picture of Dorian Gray, we're introduced to a character known for his charming beauty, or as Basil sees him - a work of art. Our first impression of Dorian Gray is his beauty, but later we get to see his true personality. All the characters in the novel are quick to judge Dorian as "good" because of his looks, which raises the question of if we should appreciate art at its base value without any consideration for the creator.      The author himself, Oscar Wilde, warns the reader that "those who go beneath the surface do so at their peril". Was this Oscar Wilde's way of telling us that ignorance is bliss? Should we also use the same innocent lens that Basil looked through? Or should we strive to have a deeper knowledge of the things we appreciate?     To me, there is no certain answer, rather I'm compelled to raise more questions. Say the ignorance of not knowing a certain artist's personality or past brings the vie...

      As my year of AP 11 English is coming to an end, I realized the number of people, pieces, and authors there are that supported me throughout my journey in AP 11. It's impossible for me to talk about AP 11 without giving these catalysts to my improvement my utmost gratitude.      I (ironically) am deeply indebted to Cathy Park Hong and her piece "The Indebted". Growing up being told by others that I am indebted to America for giving me opportunities made me feel like I needed to give back somehow, but you were the first author to tell me that my feelings of indebtedness should be pointed towards my ancestors, not America. After reading your piece "The Indebted", I started following you on, and as expected, you opened my eyes to the injustices, achievements, and overall lives of people of color. I learned both how deprived and successful people of color have been in America, forever changing my perspective of the country. Similar to "The Indeb...

    As a three year old, I was fueled by creativity. There are many incidents of my creativity at work, but this story still remains as one of the most memorable. Although I don't remember this story, my mom and aunt always bring it up when reminiscing about me as a toddler. From what I've heard, three year old me directed my own photoshoot with myself as the model.      During a trip to India, my aunt decided to take pictures of me out in my grandparent's garden. My aunt had the idea of making me do different toddler poses to show off how adorable she thought I was. My aunt dressed me in a tank top with a skirt and a flower hairpin to accentuate my cuteness.   Now what my aunt didn't know is that had a different plan in mind. After ripping out the flower hairpin from my hair, I proceeded to stand next to the flowers in the garden and have a concept photoshoot. This concept photoshoot came from the inspiration I had in mind: "the sad woman with fl...

       Picture this, you are getting married soon and your significant other chooses to get married in Las Vegas, the mystical, wonderful city that's always on the move. Time is everything here, especially for marriages. You are told your marriage will be cheap, quick, and easy, taking place in a drive through.       Now picture this, your significant other wants to have a grand Indian wedding where not only your distant relatives but also more than half the city's population will show up. Your marriage won't take a day, not even two days, it'll take place over 3 days and maybe one more for the reception. The wedding venue that will be booked will most likely cost only a couple (around one hundred thousand dollars) of dollars without food or entertainment provided.     What do you pick? Would you rather spend the precious time of getting married in a few minutes or a few days? That was my exact reaction to the drive through Las Vega...